Supermen of America Ring, Superman Ring

Supermen of America Ring, Superman Ring

His spider-sense failed to predict a bludgeoning by the recession, so Peter Parker will be swinging into unemployment lines — but only if he can pull together enough money to buy web cartridges.

Yesterday, we brought you the news of Spidey getting canned from his “Daily Bugle” photographer job in “Amazing Spider-Man” #623, and while the comic book world has some billionaires who rarely feel the crunchof financial crisis (we’re looking at you, Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne), regular guys like Spider-Man are often hit the hardest.

So, where can Peter turn to for some extra cash? Well, stand-up comedy could be a good start. Here’s our advice on how a few popular heroes could turn super powers into a super job if they put their minds to it.

SUPERMAN: Clark Kent might be invincible when it comes to bullets, but he’s never really been known as an ace reporter (that was more Lois Lane’s turf). If cut by the “Daily Planet,” Superman’s x-ray vision could net him a gig with the TSA as airport security, christening him The last Son of Sir-can-you-remove-your-belt.

BEAST: Hank McCoy worked as a genetic researcher and renowned expert in the sciences during his stint as Beast in the X-Men comics. With cuts in funding, the brilliant mutant could be forced to leave behind his noble adventures of the mind. His furry body is perfect for shampoo testing, though, or possibly a spokesperson for a razor advertising campaign. If all else fails, there’s always casting for an “Avatar” sequel.

HUMAN TORCH: Johnny Storm flexed his acting chops when he was cast as the Rawhide Kid, only later to be cut from the role. If he can’t land any more parts, the Human Torch will have to be careful flaming-on around things that aren’t easily replaceable. The obvious career choice is to become a firefighter (as he once did when the Fantastic four ran into financial woes), but if Captain America hasn’t nabbed a job at Fourth of July celebrations, Storm shouldn’t be above labeling himself The Human Firework.

FLASH: Barry Allen was a forensic scientist before becoming the Flash, but if our favorite speedster were in need of some extra dough, his friendly personality and lightning-quick speed could net him some great tips as he zipped around town delivering food.

GREEN LANTERN: While we’ll be seeing Hal Jordan in the upcoming live-action adaptation of “Green Lantern,” alternate ring-bearer Kyle Rayner might be first in line to feel the recession. As a freelance graphic artist, the shine from his ring may be the only green Rayner sees in a tough economy. however, if the ring does indeed stir his imagination to envision superheroes, his career choice is simple: the official comic book artist of Sector 2814.

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